Day 229: Columbo, Troubled Waters

Show: Columbo

Episode Particulars: S4EP4, “Troubled Waters”, original airdate February 9^th, 1975.

 Summary: Columbo’s wife won a cruise to Acapulco in a raffle, and therefore Columbo is on hand when a murder takes place. Hayden Danziger (Robert Vaughn), one of the passengers, is being blackmailed by the cruise’s lounge singer, Rosanna Wells (Poupee Bocar) about the affair they had in Las Vegas. After faking a heart attack by the pool, Danziger uses the ship’s hospital resources (examination gloves) and access to the crew staircase to sneak down to Wells’ cabin and shoot her in-between musical sets, setting it up to look like her fellow musician and former lover Lloyd Harrington (Dean Stockwell) killed her out of jealousy. Since Danziger was in the hospital when Wells’ body was brought in, Columbo asks him to assist with solving the case. Of course, we know there’s an ulterior motive to Columbo’s decision…

Standalone Thoughts: This is a pretty fun episode, mainly because it shakes things up in a variety of ways. You have the obvious of the murder taking place on a cruise ship, but you’ve also got the fact that most of the tools Columbo would normally use aren’t available to him. No ballistics department, no proper fingerprint powder (though he does jury-rig some later)…there’s not even an official photographer. It might be interesting if there was a whole MacGyver-like show dedicated to people having to make do with their limited resources to solve a crime or deal with a medical emergency. Though of course, they’d have to be realistic about it.

Getting back to this show, though, the episode also shakes things up by having Columbo flat out state to other people that he thinks Danziger is the murderer, when he normally keeps that fact to himself. This leads to some interesting conversations, though it also winds up relating to one of the more annoying mystery tropes. A lot of detectives wind up playing things close to the vest, and won’t tell their colleagues (and sometimes the audience) about things they noticed until it’s time for the grand reveal. This can be irritating if it’s a key piece of evidence needed to solve the murder, and the audience wasn’t privy to it. In this case, the audience is privy to it (Columbo finds a feather near the door to the hospital beds), but then the question arises of why Columbo didn’t bring up that fact to the Captain (Patrick Macnee), especially when the Captain was insisting it was Harrington and wondering why Columbo refused to accept the fact. It might not be much to go on, but it’s fairly incriminating evidence, and it could have led to some interesting scenes where the Captain, the doctor (Robert Douglas), and Columbo were all working together to prove for sure it was Danziger. Instead, it kind of hangs there and leaves the audience wondering why it’s not being discussed.

That aside, though, it’s a good episode. The ship’s space is used creatively, the alibi is definitely different, and the cast all do a fine job. It’s definitely worth watching, especially once you’re familiar with the Columbo formula. Though I do wonder if they ever show this episode on cruise ships…

Number of “Columbo-isms”: 3/6. Columbo hums “This old man” and says several variations of “Just one more thing”, one of which is literal. As for his wife, there’s a running gag with him never being able to find her on the ship, which adds some extra amusement to proceedings. And while it’s not a trope I’m keeping track of, it’s worth noting that Columbo spends most of this episode without his raincoat since, as he reminds us, he’s on a tropical cruise and therefore wouldn’t need it. Instead, he spends most of the time in his suit jacket, shirt sleeves, and right at the very end, a Hawaiian shirt. Surprisingly, it’s not as tacky as you’d think.

Other: *This is one of the rare episodes where Columbo is seen immediately, in fact within the first minute. Given that it’s not the usual circumstances (he’s on a ship and on vacation instead of doing his job), I think that’s a nice way of signifying that.

*On a related note to the above point, it takes about twenty-five minutes for the murder to take place. This is also somewhat unusual, but understandable, because it’s used to set up the situation, explain why Columbo’s on hand, establishes the red herring, and lets us watch Danziger prepare for the murder. All things considered, the time was used fairly efficiently.

*Danziger is diagnosed with a “slight” heart attack. I’m no medical expert, but I don’t think any heart attack is considered “slight”. Maybe it’s not as severe as it could be, but “slight” and “heart attack” probably should never be in the same sentence if you want to be taken seriously.

*The scene where Danziger prepares for the murder is noteworthy for me for two reasons. One, I’m pretty sure they reused footage of him running down the stairs. And two, the song Wells sings during it goes on forever. Since it seems to be basically the same chorus over and over again, I can’t imagine how it could get away with being that long. But maybe it’s just Hollywood license.

*I do kind of wonder where Danziger was hiding the key he used to get into Wells’ cabin, since he was only wearing his bathing suit when he faked the heart attack. Either he had the key in his bathing suit and no one checked it/he palmed it before it got taken away, or…we probably don’t want to think too much about it.

*Columbo apparently can throw on his pants and shirt in a manner of seconds, because that’s about how long it takes for him to get dressed when he’s called to the scene of the crime. Then again, I’m pretty sure that’s something you have to learn when you become a firefighter, so I can imagine it’s not that much different for cops.

*The doctor says that Wells’ body has no bruises on her. I find this surprising, given that it looked and sounded like Danziger punched her in the face when she refused to withdraw her blackmail. Even if it was a slap instead of a punch, I’d have thought that would leave a mark. But as I mentioned above, I’m not a doctor, so I could be totally wrong about that.

*Columbo uses a magnifying glass several times this episode. It’s always for a good reason, but it amuses me because he doesn’t use them normally, and since magnifying glasses are often associated with detectives, I just kind of get a kick out of it.

*We get a throwaway line here where Columbo asks Danziger to fire the suspected murder weapon, because he (Columbo) doesn’t like guns and is a bad shot. This is amusing on its own merely because of Columbo’s profession, but it’s also a bit of (probably unintentional) foreshadowing for a moment in a later episode. I’ll talk about that one when we get to it, though.

Would This Hold Up in Court?: I wasn’t sure if it would initially, but then Columbo gets incontestable proof right at the very end. It’s very cleverly done, and there’s no way Danziger could worm his way out of it. Not bad considering Columbo had to MacGyver up the solution.