Friday, December 1, 2017

Day 257: Columbo, Caution; Murder Can Be Hazardous to Your Health




Show: Columbo
Episode Particulars: S10EP2, “Caution: Murder Can Be Hazardous to Your Health”, original airdate February 20th, 1991.

 Summary: Wade Anders (George Hamilton) is the host of a popular TV show called Crime Alert, where he tells viewers about an unsolved case and urges them to call in if they see anyone fitting the description of the people involved. Of course, being popular means you have your fair share of detractors, and one of Anders’ biggest anti-fans is Budd Clarke (Peter Haskell) who would have gotten Anders’ job if Anders hadn’t talked the producers out of it. When Clarke finds an old porno featuring a young Anders, he threatens to blackmail Anders with it in order to get the job. Anders, knowing Clarke’s a heavy smoker, responds by agreeing to discuss the matter at Clarke’s house, then swapping his cigarettes with poisoned ones, with said poison making it look like Clarke died of a heart attack. It’s a clever move, but not clever enough to beat Columbo. Especially since Columbo knows a fair bit about both crime and smoking himself…


Standalone Thoughts: While this is overall a perfectly decent episode, there isn’t too much I can think to say about it. Hamilton and Falk are fine, but don’t do anything particularly noteworthy. Some of the editing choices are abrupt and odd, but are more momentarily jarring than a consistent problem. A lot of elements of the episode have been seen in previous Columbos, most notably the use of security tapes, the major plot point of “Playback”. On a related note, it’s hard not to notice the old technology of the episode, given how much of a role it plays, and it makes you wonder if the episode could even be made today, given how far things have advanced. Though it does make for an interesting thought experiment…

If there’s anything I really noticed about the episode, it’s the handling of the content. While the pacing is overall good, feeling much shorter than ninety minutes, it still feels like there’s padding in there, which actually hurts the episode in two places. One is the scene of Anders monkeying with his security camera; after we see him do it, that aspect isn’t brought up again until near the end of the episode, at which point you’re starting to wonder what the point was. The other is a bit involving Anders and Columbo’s cars, which turns out to be very relevant but doesn’t feel like it at the start. They might have worked better in other episodes, and they’re still somewhat effective here, but in practice, it needed a little more editing.

If you asked me to rate this episode, I’d say it’s probably in the middle to lower middle of the overall pack. There’s nothing particularly wrong with it, but it’s not as engaging as a good chunk of the other episodes. But at least it’s watchable, and that counts for a lot.

Number of “Columbo-isms”: While I’m really tempted to say this was another perfect 6/6, I get tripped up on the fumbling trope; I don’t remember Columbo digging through his coat, and while he does ask to borrow something, that something is tweezers, which is something you don’t expect Columbo to have on him on a regular basis (though he does seem to have a pencil for once). So I’ll reluctantly call this a 5/6, with both Dog and the car being important to the case, several mentions of Mrs. Columbo, several variations of “Just one more thing”, and Columbo whistling “This Old Man”. Columbo also shows up in a tux briefly, though when it’s not buttoned up, you can see he’s as rumpled as ever. Some things never change, it seems.

Other: *I can’t help but be slightly amused at the fact that the two episodes featuring George Hamilton involve both doctors and injecting someone with something. Granted, they’re in two entirely different contexts, and the bit with the doctor is a fakeout in this episode, but I enjoy a good coincidence.

*I had to wait for the credits to make the connection, but Maxine “Max” Jarrett, the woman who seems to be in charge of the technical aspects of Crime Alert, is played by Penny Johnson, who also played Kasidy Yates on DS9. Sometimes it’s a small world in projects like these.

*As Anders is poisoning the cigarettes, the camera lingers on the “Caution: smoking can be hazardous to your health” label on one of the packs. It’s not quite a Cinemasins “Roll Credits”, but it’s a little too on-the-nose for my tastes.

*I am curious how the crew got the footage for “Holly Does Huston”, the porn film. Did they find a clip from an old movie George Hamilton did, a la “Forgotten Lady”? Or did they just get someone who sort of looked like Hamilton did when he was younger, and hope the grainy film stock would obscure the details? Either way, I appreciate their dedication.

*As in “Old Fashioned Murder”, Columbo winds up getting a haircut. Unlike in the previous episode, however, I can’t tell if there was a change. Maybe it’s a little less bushy, but ultimately, I can’t tell much of a difference. Which I suppose is fine, especially since Columbo likes the way it looks, but it does make you wonder what the point ultimately was. It can work as a character moment, but when you combine it with other bits in this episode, it winds up feeling more like padding. Speaking of which…

*The dance routine that’s supposedly going to take place during an awards presentation is not only obvious padding, but it serves as quite the blast from the past, almost as much as the technology use. Both the music and the outfits feel like something out of the 80’s, even though this episode was made in 1991. That being said, a few of the outfits do look closer to the 90’s coloring, so a change is starting to take place. We’ll see how much of an “Oh, yeah, I remember that!” feeling I get as we get more into the 90’s episodes.

Would This Hold Up in Court?: Yes; Columbo’s got two decent pieces of evidence, and (presumably) acquired them without trickery. That being said, it’s not the strongest evidence ever, and Columbo did have to push Anders a little to ensure he got recorded evidence. Still, compared to some of the other things Columbo’s done over the years, I’d say this one’s pretty much above board.


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