Day 261: Columbo, A Bird in the Hand...

Show: Columbo

Episode Particulars: S10EP6, “A Bird in the Hand…”, original airdate June 19^th, 1992.

 Summary: Harold McCain (Greg Evigan) is a serious gambler who’s currently in serious debt. He’s kept himself out of trouble by relying on the generosity of his uncle, the owner of a football team who’s gained the nickname “Big Fred” (Steve Forrest), but Fred’s finally lost patience with his nephew. Even trying to get money through Fred’s wife Dolores (Tyne Daly) isn’t enough. So McCain hatches a brilliant plan; he’ll build a pipe bomb, stick it under Fred’s car, and then try to pass it off as mob activity. Unfortunately, not only is Fred killed by a hit-and-run driver, but someone else winds up starting the car and getting blown to kingdom come before McCain can remove the bomb. Which means that this case definitely now falls under Columbo’s jurisdiction.

Standalone Thoughts: Initially, I thought the episode had some potential. Having McCain’s target die in a totally unrelated circumstance to the one McCain planned and having an innocent third party get blown up instead is one of those deviations from the Columbo formula that I can get behind. But the end result just wound up falling flat for me, partly because it was immediately obvious what was going on (which is the whole point of Columbo, I know, but it felt poorly executed here), and partly because it feels like the innocent third party’s death is almost completely glossed over. Other than a handful of scenes, that investigation is mostly shunted to the side in favor of another, related murder, which does flow naturally from what came before but also feels kind of shoehorned in. The fact that I feel really sorry for the victim doesn’t help.

I’m also really baffled at the way they chose to portray Dolores. She had the potential to be a character who’s smarter than people give her credit for, but I think the script was actually going for “ruthless but stupid”, and played that up to uncomfortable levels. I’ve noticed that people playing alcoholics on this show almost always overdo it, and that’s definitely the case here. Furthermore, she’s got an incredibly thick Southern accent, a relationship with McCain that feels somewhat incestuous, and the costuming department insists on dressing her in outfits that absolutely don’t flatter her figure; the first outfit in particular doesn’t look like it would look good on anybody. She felt more like a stereotype than a character, and that may be why the second half of the episode, when she takes center stage, doesn’t work very well for me.

Finally, I’m particularly unsatisfied by the last act. I think it’s partially because the story crams a whole episode’s worth of clues and investigations into a few minutes, so we don’t get the usual Columbo shenanigans. However, the primary reason it doesn’t work for me is because Admiral Plot Device has his hands all over the clues. Everything had to come together in just the right way to get the desired result, and it felt too contrived. It might have been better if the clues had had more room to breathe, but in this format, it’s one step away from a disaster. Chalk this episode up as another one for the lower end of the episode rankings.

Number of “Columbo-isms”: 3/6, and a few moments that could be construed as fumbling, but they’re not clear cut enough for me to say it’s a definite yes. But we do absolutely get glimpses of the car, a few mentions of Mrs. Columbo, and two literal “Just one more things” in rapid succession. Still, the tropes felt a bit thin on the ground today. Maybe the crew was still recovering from “No Time to Die” and needed to get back into the swing of things.

Other: *Given the times we live in now, I find it incredibly difficult to believe that there was ever a period in our history, especially our recent history, where magazines would run articles about how to make pipe bombs. But it also didn’t feel like a contrivance for the story, so I have to assume that was actually a thing at one point. It still seems like an incredibly stupid thing, though.

*The scene where McCain spots his uncle’s car shortly before he plants the bomb is very obviously a still photograph that the camera zoomed in on. Was it that difficult to shoot actual film of the car at night? Or did the film get ruined somehow and this was the best they could come up with?

*The morning talk show that McCain listens to at one point is just awful. I know there have been shows where you have a ditzy host and a straight man, but I would have thought that style had vanished by the 90’s. Apparently not, and more’s the pity.

*Several times over the course of the episode, we can hear a loud meowing in McCain’s house, but we never see the cat making the noise. Later, the police find a bowl of milk knocked over that they confirm was meant for the cat…and the cat still doesn’t show up. What, was there no room in the budget to get a cat for one scene?

*When Columbo is questioning Dolores, there’s a female officer in the same room with them…reading a Cosmo-style magazine. She’s at least paying attention to what’s going on, since she does supply Columbo with information at one point, but it just seems unprofessional to be reading when you’re clearly on duty. Eh, maybe Columbo cuts them some slack as long as they do their jobs; after all, he’s the very definition of unorthodox police methods.

*I’m sure there’s supposed to be a significance to the fact that Dolores is surrounded by injured football players at the start of the final scene, but I’ll also admit that I don’t quite know what that significance is. Feel free to leave a comment shedding some light on this.

Would This Hold Up in Court?: While Columbo obtained all his evidence legally for once, it’s all flimsy enough that I’m not sure it would obtain the conviction he’s looking for. But at least he probably won’t get yelled at by his superiors.