Day 208: Columbo, Short Fuse

Show: Columbo

Episode Particulars: S1EP6, “Short Fuse”, original airdate January 19^th, 1972.

 Summary: Rodger Stanford (Roddy McDowall) is a brilliant but flighty young man who wants more power at his father’s chemical company, but is being blocked by his uncle, David Buckner (James Gregory). When Buckner gets enough dirt on Stanford that he attempts to force him to resign, Stanford rigs up a bomb in a cigar box and swaps it for the real cigar box just before Buckner heads up to the mountains to his private retreat. The bomb goes off as planned, but what isn’t planned is that Columbo gets assigned to investigate Buckner’s disappearance, and even once the wreckage is found, it’s determined that it falls under his jurisdiction. Stanford may be a wunderkind, but there’s a lot to be said for being older and wiser at times. Though loving cigars might help Columbo out in this case too.

Standalone Thoughts: While I do have a few talking points about this episode, the most memorable thing about it in the long run is the final setpiece, which is really well done even if it kind of falls apart if you think about it too much (which we’ll touch on). Otherwise, it’s kind of bland. Not a bad episode, but it left me feeling indifferent for the most part.

Now, talking points. One is that Roddy McDowall makes for a particularly insufferable murderer this time around. I’m not saying all the murderers were likeable, but they generally carried themselves reasonably well. McDowall acts like a smug jerk pretty much from the word go, so instead of wanting to watch him bounce off Columbo, I was kind of bracing myself to deal with his annoying nature for an hour and fifteen minutes. Now, he does get slightly better and it’s in keeping with his character, but that doesn’t make it any less frustrating to sit through. That being said, I’ve seen McDowall in other things and liked him just fine, so I think this is just a case of him playing the part a little too well.

Next, technology. I normally don’t comment on the technology in Columbo, because I know it was a different era and it generally adds nothing to the discussion to chuckle at what computers were like in the 70’s. But this is an episode that relies heavily on technology that doesn’t work the same way today. For one thing, one piece of evidence relies on finding the typewriter that wrote a letter, which just doesn’t work today in our era of computers. There’s also the fact that car phones have been phased out and replaced with cell phones, though that’s a minor point that’s not too big a deal. Above all, though, there’s the material surrounding an answering machine. In-universe, it’s there to explain why Columbo was called in and start making him suspicious of Stanford, because the message mentions the lack of cigars in the car and takes place in the minute before the car blows up, although Buckner hangs up before the explosion. It’s a little bit Admiral Plot Device, but I can mostly put up with it. No, the problem I have with it is that Buckner’s message starts recording before the answering machine has finished playing the “please leave a message” greeting, and it’s during that bit that most of the information about the cigars is conveyed. From my modern eyes, that looks like a massive contrivance, because except in very rare circumstances, answering machines don’t do that nowadays. But maybe this was common back in 1972—there’s no beep indicating that Buckner should start talking, after all—and this wouldn’t have been seen as odd. I kind of wish I knew the answer, because that way it turns a plot contrivance into an interesting time capsule.

Finally, there’s that setpiece. As I said, it’s pretty memorable; it feels like something that would be right at home in a Hitchcock movie with only minimal tweaking. However…not only does it feel like a questionable police tactic, but it kind of goes against Columbo’s previously established behavior, both here and in “Ransom for a Dead Man”. I like the atmosphere and the fact that Columbo is taking a tactic Stanford used earlier in the episode and turning it against him, but it doesn’t hold up to a lot of scrutiny. Or maybe that’s just me overthinking it after spending most of 2017 doing nothing but overthinking TV shows.

Everything else in the episode ranges from ok to bland. There’s not a lot of little details for Columbo to obsess over, though there is a lot of business jargon that I get the gist of but couldn’t fully process. The cameramen and editors mostly behave themselves, though they can’t resist doing quick cuts between the bomb and the timer in Stanford’s darkroom that get annoying real fast. And the acting is fine, though mostly overshadowed by McDowall. In short, it’s not Columbo’s strongest episode, but if you’re just taking it for what it is, you probably won’t have much of a problem with it.

Number of “Columbo-isms”: 3/6, though that’s a close thing. There’s definitely use and mention of his car and his wife crops up twice, but the “Just one more thing” moment isn’t quite the same as I’m used to, as Columbo launches into his observation without any preamble. Still, it’s a parting shot, so I’m willing to count it.

Other: *I wonder if the idea for this episode came from the rumor that the CIA had tried to kill Fidel Castro with an exploding cigar back in 1961. The fact that Stanford calls it an exploding cigar and then mentions that the cigars are Cuban makes it all the more suspicious.

*The lamp/magnifier that Stanford uses to make the bomb (as seen in my header) is pretty neat. I don’t know if that’s an actual thing or Hollywood magic, but I think those need to be more widespread. That looks like it could come in handy for all sorts of things.

*This episode is unusual in that it has a pre-credits scene. The entire scene of Stanford making the bomb plays before we get any sort of credits. I’ll have to see if that becomes the new norm. If not, I wonder why they did it in this case.

*There was one scene that I ascribed more import to then there actually was. When Columbo is listening to the answering machine message, you can tell that he’s noticed that Stanford is constantly looking at his watch. Just as the message ends. Columbo knocks over a drink that was on the desk. Maybe I’m used to this being a trope, but I read the scene as him doing it on purpose, and I thought there was an ulterior motive to it, like to get a close look at Stanford’s watch to see if it was working or something like that. But it never comes up again once the spill is cleaned up, so I have to assume, if it was on purpose, that he did it just to keep his cover as a bumbler. It’s a good tactic, but a less exciting one.

*I had a semi-uncomfortable flashback to Poirot’s “The Kidnapped Prime Minister” when there was a long exposition dump that took place as Columbo and Stanford were walking down some stairs. In an attempt to keep things interesting, the camera tried several different shots—distance shots, looking up from under the stairs, etc.—but instead of making it less boring, it becomes distracting. Then again, it was probably incredibly boring to film, and the information had to come out somehow, so I guess I can’t fault the crew for wanting to liven things up a bit.

Would This Hold Up in Court?: On the one hand, yes, because the evidence is pretty damning. On the other hand, Columbo did a dirty trick to get that evidence, so a lawyer might be able to get it thrown out. So let’s call this one a “yes, but…”