Day 226: Columbo, An Exercise in Fatality

Show: Columbo

Episode Particulars: S4EP1, “An Exercise in Fatality”, original airdate September 15^th, 1974.

 Summary: Milo Janus (Robert Conrad) is an exercise guru with a thriving business. Unbeknownst to almost everyone, though, he’s been up to some shady business practices, funneling most of the money overseas and planning to leave America entirely when the time is right. When one of his investors, Gene Stafford (Philip Bruns), guesses the truth, Janus kills him and makes it look like it was an accident involving workout equipment. He also uses some recordings of Stafford’s voice to give himself an alibi and make the time of death seem to be later than it actually was. Enter Columbo, who may not be in shape but has a sharp mind to make up for it. It’s not exactly brains over brawn, but one could make that comparison if they wished to.

Standalone Thoughts: While I think this episode missed an opportunity to have Columbo solve the case while being whipped into shape by Janus (it feints in that direction twice, but I feel they could have done more with it), the material is still pretty good. In particular, I like the flashes of personality we see from Columbo. Obviously, his whole shtick is that he comes across as bumbling yet affable, and he never breaks character even when he’s actually accusing someone. But this time, he changes his tone twice. The first is after dealing with some annoying bureaucracy, and he lets his frustration show via sarcasm. The second is when he’s confronting Janus near the end of the episode, and he sounds genuinely angry. As with the previous example of Columbo getting angry, I actually think this is in character; Columbo doesn’t like the fact that Janus’ actions are affecting innocent people, and he’s making his displeasure known. The fact that it’s a woman in this case actually adds more fuel to the fire, because it suggests that Columbo has a chivalrous streak, which seems very appropriate for him.

There’s some other interesting beats as well. For once, the victim has a chance to run and fight back, which allows for a little extra drama. Similarly, when one character confronts Janus over his shady business dealings and reveals themselves to be a threat to his plans, Janus doesn’t try to murder them as well. This one doesn’t add much to the plot, but it’s a deviation from the norm, and therefore noteworthy. It’s the little things that can keep things fresh, after all.

As for the main story, it’s fine. Like I said, they could have worked the exercise angle more, but what we do get is fun, and Falk in general is in fine form. I do that that the bureaucracy scene drags a bit, but I’m also pretty sure that was the point, and we get a decent payoff out of it. In the end, it’s a decent start to the season, and I’ll be curious to see how the rest of them go from here.

Number of “Columbo-isms”: 5/6, most of which are fairly large. The car only gets a few appearances and there’s only one scene where Columbo sings “This Old Man”, but he has one lengthy conversation about his wife, one lengthy conversation with his wife, constant fumbling for pencils, matches, and even his watch, and a lot of variations of “Just one more thing”, including literally saying those words. Dare I say that the tropes got a real workout today?

Other: *The little jingle that the crew came up with for Janus’ gym is the perfect blend of catchy and annoying, complete with the perky female voice. I don’t know if it was meant as a deliberate parody or if it was made with total sincerity, but you can’t get much more “sign of the times” than that.

*Janus sets up his alibi by inviting some friends over to watch a movie that’s, in his words, a “horror film, X-rated and uncut”. Now, I’m pretty sure “X-rated” in 1974 was more like our NC-17 rating today, but even then, that doesn’t fit the glimpses of the movie we see, which appear to be a black-and-white movie with organ music in the soundtrack. It looks more like they’re watching a silent movie than anything. Granted, horror and silent movies aren’t mutually exclusive; for all I know, they’re watching Nosferatu. In fact, I’m just going to imagine that from now on.

*Columbo intimates today that he prefers women with some meat on their bones, which makes sense (he’s from Italian stock) and kind of sweet, since it’s a reminder that not everyone goes for the supermodel look. I don’t know, it just sounded nice coming from him.

*The music at the end of the bureaucracy scene is oddly chipper and bouncy, odd in the sense that the background music in Columbo rarely sounds like that. Still, it fits the moment, so it’s not that out of place.

*Columbo mentions that he’s got a new boss, one who wants Columbo to get every little detail. It’s probably an excuse to get more things out of Janus, but given what happened in “A Friend in Deed”, I wonder if the part about the new boss might not be true.

*The show did something a little different today; it’s got end credits of a sort. Before, the credits would play over freeze frames of scenes from the episode. Today, it was just one shot (which was a composite of someone walking at sunset with a flashlight and an inset of Columbo), and the music was the aforementioned jingle. I doubt they’re going to keep that jingle all the time, so I’ll be curious to see if there’s a new end credit theme too. But I won’t know for sure until two episodes from now. Rest assured, though, that I’ll keep you apprised.

Would This Hold Up in Court?: My gut reaction is saying no. Columbo tried to explain it, but it just seemed really flimsy to me and would probably be fairly easy to get around in court. As always, though, this may just be a matter of opinion.